February 27th 2022, yup it has come around again.
A simple day, a relaxing Sunday. So what is the big deal, right?
My son Patrick has his birthday on this date and that is a very significant date for me.
Patrick turns 9 today, imagine my little boy 9 years of age, I suppose not really fair to him to say little boy as Patrick was born big and kept on growing. He was always ahead of the growth curve at the doctor’s appointments when he was a baby. On track with normal growth just well above the average in terms of size.
Feels good to be a parent when your baby boy is a bruiser of a young man😊
Patrick died in a drowning incident when he was only 1 year and 4 months old. So, yup! That has been a few years ago now. 7 years and a bit. 7 years celebrating his birthday without him. 7 years thinking of him and how he might look now. 7 years of wondering how and why he had to die.
Grieving the loss of a child ia not always logical nor is it “by the book” if there were a book of standard on this topic.
Something to note on the life of being a bereaved parent, when we lose our parents we can be known as orphaned, when we lose a wife or husband we become a widow or widower. When we lose a child we gain no title, we gain perhaps a status of misfit or just someone who becomes out of place in many so called “normal” places in life. Birthdays for instance, many parents look forward to them and enjoy them to the full. A bereaved parent like myself also looks forward to the date on the calendar in a very weird anxious yet scary kind of way. We wish to enjoy it to the full also, though we never know if it might be one of those breakdown days. Grieving and grief can do that to a person and I have found that the grief process has brought me to a great elevation of enjoying my emotional self. So, I embrace the good days and the bad. I embrace with gratitude for the learning Patrick’s life has brought to me, knowing what real love as a father is.
You may find my life story on my first book where I discuss much more about my life and the loss of my two sons. Patrick was not my first son and I had lost my first son Darra a year and half or so before Patrick was born.
I know about this grief stuff and the loss a parent can feel when a child has died.
In another of my books I have shared many of the tools and tips of how I have overcome and have become very grateful to life and to my sons.
TWO sons TOO many, is the title of my life story.
Layman’s Handbook in life, is my self help / selflove tool kit that I love as it has been how I have survived my grief and how I have rebuilt my life time and time again.
Both of these are available on paperback & ebook.
I promote these as my monument to my sons. And on days like this one today while I am deep in thought for my lost loved ones. I share with you.
Have a wonderful March.